Classes We’d Really Like To See Offered At the Community Center

Class Joke

SELF-IMPROVEMENT WORKSHOPS

  • Creative Suffering
  • Overcoming Peace of Mind
  • Guilt without Sex
  • The Primal Shrug
  • Ego Gratification through Violence
  • Holding your Child’s Attention through Guilt and Fear
  • Dealing with Post Self-realization Depression
  • Whine and Whimper Your Way to Alienation

BUSINESS/CAREER WORKSHOPS

  • Money Can Make You Rich
  • Tawkin’ Good: How to Improve Your Spitch and Get a More Betterer Payn’ Job
  • I Made $100 in Real Estate
  • Career Opportunities in Iran
  • Under-Achiever’s Guide to Very Small Business Opportunities
  • Filler Phrases for Thesis Writers
  • Tax Shelters for the Indigent
  • Looters Guide to American Cities

HOME ECONOMICS WORKSHOPS

  • How to Convert Your Family Room into a Rabbit Run
  • How to Cultivate Viruses in your Refrigerator
  • Burglar-Proof Your Home with Concrete
  • Basic Kitchen Taxidermy
  • Sinus Drainage at Home
  • 101 Other Uses for Your Vacuum Cleaner
  • How to Convert Your Wheelchair into a Dune Buggy

HEALTH AND FITNESS WORKSHOPS

  • Creative Tooth Decay
  • Exorcism and Belly-Button Lint
  • The Joys of Hypochondria
  • Suicide and Your Health
  • Bio-feedback and How to Stop It
  • Skate Your Way to Regularity
  • Tap Dance Your Way to Social Ridicule
  • Optional Body Functions

CRAFT WORKSHOPS

  • Self-Actualization Through Macrame
  • Needlecraft for Junkies
  • Homeschoolers’ Guide to Bad Taste
  • Cuticle Crafts
  • Mobiles and Collages with Fetishes
  • Gifts for the Senile
  • Bonsai Your Pet
  • Building the 747 with Basic Lincoln Logs

A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke.

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