Milpitas Mom's Favorite Jokes
A man and his wife were driving their Recreational Vehicle across California and were nearing a town spelled Milpitas. They noted the strange spelling and tried to figure how to pronounce it - MIL-pit-as; Mil-pit-ASS; Mil-PEET-us?
They grew more perplexed as they drove into the town. Since they were hungry, they pulled into a place to get something to eat. At the counter, the man said to the waitress: "My wife and I can't seem to be able to figure out how to pronounce this place. Will you tell me where we are and say it very slowly so that I can understand."
The waitress looked at him and said: "Buuurrrgerrr Kiiiinnnng."
[Note from your Milpitas Guide: that third pronunciation for this city is the correct one: Mil-PEET-us]