The Day the NASDAQ Died

NASDAQ

Money Jokes

Sung to the tune of “American Pie”:

A long, long week ago
I can still remember how the market used to make me smile
What I’d do when I had the chance
Is get myself a cash advance
And add another tech stock to the pile.

But Jerome Powell made me shiver
With every speech that he delivered
Bad news on the rate front
Still I’d take one more punt.

I can’t remember if I cried
When I heard about the CPI
I lost my fortune and my pride
The day the NASDAQ died.

So bye-bye to my piece of the pie
Now I’m gettin’ calls for margin
‘Cause my cash account’s dry
It’s just two weeks from a new all-time high
And now we’re right back where we were in July
We’re right back where we were in July.

Did you buy stocks you never heard of?
QCOM at 150 or above?
‘Cos George Gilder told you so
Now do you believe in Home Depot?
Can Wal-Mart save your portfolio?
And can you teach me what’s a P/E ratio?

Well, I know that you were leveraged too
So you can’t just take a long-term view
Your broker shut you down
No more margin could be found.

I never worried on the whole way up
Buying dot coms from the back of a truck
But Friday I ran out of luck
It was the day the NASDAQ died.

I started singin’
Bye-bye to my piece of the pie
Now I’m gettin’ calls for margin
‘Cause my cash account’s dry
It’s just two weeks from a new all-time high
And now we’re right back where we were in July
Yeah we’re right back where we were in July.

How can I become a millionaire?

Links for kids about investing.

Stock Market Game
Discover the risks and excitment involved in investing a pretend $100,000 in real-world stocks.

Treasury’s Page For Kids
Learn about savings bonds, money and coins, or play “Lemonade Stand” or other money games.

A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke.