How Many Dogs Does It Take To Change A Light Bulb?

Dog Breeds

ROTTWEILER: Just one. You want to make something of it?

DOBERMAN: Immediately decides to change the brand of light bulb and find a more efficient form of lighting — perhaps a fluorescent bulb.

AUSTRALIAN SHEPHERD: One, but just “try” to convince him that the burned-out bulb is useless and should be thrown away.

JACK RUSSELL TERRIER: Two, but the job never gets done — they just keep arguing about who is supposed to do it and how it’s supposed to be done!

BULLDOG: Just one. But it takes them three years to do it.

POMERANIANS don’t change light bulbs, although sometimes their agent will get a German Shepherd in to do the job for them while they’re out.

PUG: Er, two. Or maybe one. No — on second thought, make that two. Is that OK with you?

GOLDEN RETRIEVER: The sun is shining, the day is young, we’ve got our whole lives ahead of us, and you’re inside worrying about a stupid burned-out light bulb?

AFGHAN: Light bulb? What light bulb?

CAT: I don’t waste my time with these childish jokes.

SHIBA-INU: Zero! Shibas aren’t afraid of the dark!

SCHIPPERKE: It’s your light bulb — change it yourself. Unless….. Is there food involved??

POODLE: Sorry, Just had my nails done.

BEAGLE: How many cookies do I get?

WEIMARANER: What?? Light bulb? You want ME to change a LIGHT BULB?

LAB: Why change it? The darker it is, the longer I can sleep.

BASENJI: LIGHT BULB? We don’t change no stinking light bulbs!

MALAMUTE: Let *him* do it. You can pet me while he’s busy.

BOXER: If I could stop wiggling my butt long enough to quit falling off the chair…….

AMERICAN BULLDOG: One. JUMP, remove bulb, land. JUMP, replace bulb, land. Two: What light bulb, So? We can play in the dark.

GOLDEN RETRIEVER: “I’ll be glad to change the light bulb for you, but first can’t we play catch with the tennis ball, or Frisbee — and then I want to lick your face and rest my head in your lap and look up at you with my sad eyes. What, you’re changing the light bulb yourself — you didn’t have to do that — but I looooove you so much for being my friend and doing that.”

DALMATIAN: Just one, but it will really hate the new bulb.

ROTTWEILER: I’ll change the light bulb if I can eat the old one.

CORGI: I can’t reach the stupid lamp!

SPRINGER: Light bulb? Light bulb? That thing I just ate was a light bulb?

STANDARD POODLE: None. Go get human, sit under it, look up and point it out — then go lie down in disgust that it took so long.

BORDER COLLIE: Just one. And he’ll rewire the house while he’s at it.

WOLFDOG: Let me see that light bulb, anyway. What’s it made of, what’s inside of it, what will happen if I drop it. I might change it, but let me think about it. You’re not trying to tell me what to do, are you? Hey, I just had a great idea. I think I’ll change that light bulb!

GERMAN SHEPHERD: “I’m kinda busy right now! I have to chase the cat, protect the kids, herd the horses, beg for food and take a nap. I’ll add the light bulb to my “To Do” list….”

DACHSHUND: Well, first get me a ladder and a treat…… no, you took too long. I want TWO treats and I’ll do it……… No, not that treat, the other kind. Geez………. do I have to do everything? (of course, followed by “the look”.)

IRISH SETTER: It only takes one, but it will put in a really dim bulb.

PIT BULL TERRIER: Jump and take hold of old light bulb. Now, let go of old light bulb…….. I said LET GO OF LIGHT BULB! Please???? Let go of the light bulb?????? Let go?

GOOD OL’ SOUTHERN HOUND DOG: Huh????

 

A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke

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