Log On
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Makin’ the wood stove hotter.
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Log Off
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Don’t add any more wood.
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Monitor
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Keep an eye on the wood stove.
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Download
|
Gettin’ the firewood off the pickup.
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Mega Hertz
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When yer not careful downloadin’ (watch th’ toes).
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Floppy Disk
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Whatcha get from pilin’ too much firewood.
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Disk Operating System
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The equipment the Doc uses when you have a floppy disk.
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RAM
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The hydraulic thingy that makes the woodsplitter work.
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Hard Drive
|
Gettin’ home in mud season.
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Prompt
|
What you wish the mail was in mud season.
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Windows
|
What to shut when it’s 50 degrees, and that’s real cold in Milpitas!
|
Screen
|
What you need for black fly season.
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Byte
|
What black flies do.
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Chip
|
What to munch on.
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Micro Chip
|
What’s left in the bag when the chips are gone.
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Infrared
|
Where the leftovers go when Fred’s around.
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Modem
|
What you did to the hay fields.
|
Dot Matrix
|
John Matrix’s wife.
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Printer
|
Someone who can’t write in cursive.
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Lap Top
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Where little kids feel comfy.
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Keyboard
|
Where you hang your keys.
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Software
|
Them plastic eatin’ utensils.
|
486
|
One of them fancy imported cars.
|
Mouse
|
What eats the horses’ grain in the barn.
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Main Frame
|
The part of the barn that holds the roof up.
|
Port
|
Fancy wine.
|
Enter
|
C’mon in!
|
Random Access Memory
|
When you suddenly can’t remember how much that new rifle costs when your wife asks.
|
Digital
|
Like those numbers that flip on your alarm clock.
|
Apple
|
If you don’t know what an apple is, I ain’t tellin’.
|
Program
|
What’s on the TV when TCI has reception.
|
CD ROM
|
The place in the back where they sell retirement accounts.
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