Christmas Jokes – Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Jokes
Christmas Carol Quiz
These are the names of well-known Christmas caroles, rewritten in PC (pretty convoluted). If you like puzzles, try to decipher them.
Christmas Riddles
What do snowmen eat for breakfast? What do you call people who are afraid of Santa?
Christmas Riddles, Puns and Jokes
Why are Christmas trees like people who can’t knit? They both drop their needles.
An Engineer Calculates Santa’s Trip
No known species of reindeer can fly. But it is estimated that there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer.
Fruit Cake Recipe
Sample the whiskey to check for quality. Take a large bowl. Put it down somewhere. Check the whiskey again.
How We Know Santa’s Reindeer Are Female
Only women would be able to drag a fat man in a red velvet suit all around the world in one night and not get lost.
I Think Santa Claus is a Woman
I hate to be the one to defy sacred myth, but I believe he’s a she. Think about it.
An Interview with Santa’s Lawyer
Please state your name and occupation. My name is Marta Pittman, and I’m a partner at the Law Office of Garry Barbadillo.
Letter From Santa
The recent announcement that Donner and Blitzen have elected to take the early reindeer retirement package has triggered a good deal of concern about whether they will be replaced.
Martha Stewart Holiday Calendar
Blanch carcass from Thanksgiving turkey. Spray paint gold, turn upside down and use as a sleigh to hold Christmas Cards.
Night Before Christmas for Mom
T’was the night before Christmas, in a Milpitas abode,
Only one creature was stirring, and she was cleaning the commode.
Planning the Company Holiday Party
I’m happy to inform you that the office Christmas Party will take place on December 23, starting at noon in the banquet room at Luigi’s Open Pit Barbecue.
Rudolf, The Red
An America couple was being shown around Moscow one day, when the man felt a drop hit his nose.
Santa’s Prayer
The sleigh was all packed, the reindeer were fed,
But Santa still knelt by the side of the bed.
Santa’s Workshop Bought By Bill Gates – 2020 Version
‘Twas the night before Christmas, When all through the house
The computer was humming, the icons were hopping, As Papa did last-minute Internet shopping.
Web Addiction Holiday Sing Along
Doorbell rings, I’m not list’nin’, From my mouth, drool is glist’nin’, I’m happy although my boss let me go Happily addicted to the Web.