Women Jokes – Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Jokes

Advice For Married Women: Then and Now
Just leave him a voice mail message regarding where you’d like to eat and at what time.

Buying Swimwear
I have just been through the annual pilgrimage of torture and humiliation known as buying a bathing costume.

How many women with PMS does it take to screw in a light bulb?
ONE!! And do you know WHY it only takes ONE?

Mom Song Mom’s Song and Teen’s Answer
What a mom says in 24 hours, condensed into 2 minutes and 55 seconds. Sung to the William Tell Overture, by Anita Renfroe.

The Mommy Test
How do mommys know all those things?

Mother’s Dictionary
Independent: How we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.

No Cookies, No Candy, No Gum 
Now Ellen, we just have half of the aisles left to go through; don’t be upset. It won’t be long.

Recipe For Doing the Family Wash 
Written in its original spelling for a bride a few generations ago.

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Add Later

Basic Pregnancy Questions
Q: What is the most common pregnancy craving?
A: For men to be the ones who get pregnant.

Mother: Do You Know What One Is?
“I’m a Research Associate in the field of Child Development and Human Relations.”