Milpitas Jokes A man and his wife were driving their Recreational Vehicle across California and were nearing a town spelled Milpitas. They noted the strange spelling and tried to figure how to pronounce it – MIL-pit-as; Mil-pit-ASS; Mil-PEET-us? They grew more perplexed as they drove into the town. Since they were hungry, they pulled into a place to get something to eat. At the counter, the man said to the waitress: “My wife and I can’t seem to be able to figure out how to pronounce this place. Will you tell me where we are and say it very slowly so that I can understand.” The waitress looked at him…

Milpitas Jokes Have you seen the well to do? Up and down Calaveras Avenue? On that famous thoroughfare, With their noses in the air? Snazzy suits and starched collars,  Votes are sold for lots of dollars.  Spending every dime,  For a wonderful time! If you’re poor and you don’t know, Who took it, why don’t you go, Where power $its? Puttin’ On The Hitz.Different babes chased every day,They harrass, and get away,Employees with perfect tits –Puttin’ On The Hitz. Dressed up like a million dollar good-guy,Trying hard not to look a lie.Still puttin’ On The Hitz. Come, let’s mix where donors,Place their bribes as celluar-phoners,Puttin’ On The Hit$. Spangled gowns upon a beautyof hand-me-downs, on clown and…

Milpitas Jokes This story takes a little background; the names have been changed to protect the guilty. Ian works in a little coffee, chai, and sandwich place in Milpitas. Peter is his boss and the owner of the shop, and yes, this actually happened. Ian is telling the story. A special presentation of the “Stupid Award” goes to this customer. Below is an approximate conversation with her. Customer: Yes, I’d like a milk with some coffee in it. Ian: So, that’s just a splash of coffee in a milk? Customer: No, a regular amount of milk, but not coffee. Ian: Is there more milk or coffee? Customer: Oh, definitely more…

Milpitas Jokes Finding Good Deals in Milpitas: Sign in a Milpitas gas station: Coke — 49 cents. Two for a dollar! How Milpitas Clerks Check For Valid VISA Cards: I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk noticed that I had never signed my name on the back of the credit card. She informed me that she could not complete the transaction unless the card was signed. When I asked why, she explained that it was necessary to compare the signature on the credit card with the signature I just signed on the receipt. So I signed the credit card in front of her. She…

Milpitas Jokes Bob Hill and his new wife, Betty, are vacationing in Silicon Valley, California; as it happens, in the Milpitas hills. They’re driving a rental car along a rare deserted highway. It’s late, and raining very hard. Bob can barely see 10 feet in front of the car. Suddenly the car skids out of control! Bob attempts to control the car, but to no avail! The car swerves and smashes into a tree. Moments later, Bob shakes his head to clear the fog. Dazed, he looks over at the passenger seat and sees his new wife unconscious, with her head bleeding! Despite the rain and unfamiliar countryside, Bob knows…

Milpitas Jokes An artist asked the Yolette, curator at the Community Art and History Museums, if there had been any interest in his paintings on display at that time. “I have good news and bad news,” the Yolette replied. “The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death When I told him it would, he bought all 15 of your paintings.” “That’s wonderful,” the artist exclaimed. “What’s the bad news?” “The guy was your doctor.” A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke.