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Licking Is Totally the Same as Hand-washing, Right?
Covid Jokes Me: Did you wash your hands? 4-year-old: No. Me: Why are your hands wet? 4: I licked them. That should kill the germs. How to Stop Kids From Licking Their Fingers A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke.
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Dating in the Time of Coronavirus
Covid Jokes Love in Lockdown We went speed dating on Zoom and found love. You’ve seen the events announcements here for online speed dating, right? So here’s how it works for these singles. A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke.
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A Recap of the First Three Weeks with Covid-19
Covid Jokes Here’s a recap of the last three weeks, courtesy of Peter Lengsfelder: A RECAP OF THE LAST THREE WEEKS AMERICA: Oh my god! Coronavirus! What should we do? CALIFORNIA: Shut down your state. AMERICA: Wait… what? Why? CALIFORNIA: Because 40 million people live here and we did it early, and it’s working. OHIO: Whoa… whoa… let’s not be hasty now. The president said that this whole coronavirus thing is a democratic hoax. CALIFORNIA: He also said that windmills cause cancer. Shut down your state. TEXAS: But the president said that there are only 15 cases and soon there will be zero. CALIFORNIA: The president can’t count to fifteen.…
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Covid-19 is making me crack up!
Covid Jokes Covid-19 is making me crack up! Half of us are going to come out of this quarantine as amazing cooks. The other half will come out with a drinking problem. I used to spin that toilet paper like I was on Wheel of Fortune. Now I turn it like I’m cracking a safe. I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator. Still haven’t decided where to go for Passover/Easter—– The Living Room or The Bedroom Public Service Announcement: Every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom. Homeschooling is going well. 2 students…
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Neil Diamond vs CDC on Hands, Touching Hands
Covid Jokes Neil Diamond: Hands, CDC: Yes, wash them for at least 20 seconds. Neil Diamond: touching hands, CDC: No! Please don’t touch hands! Neil Diamond: reaching out… CDC: Avoid that, too! Neil Diamond: touching me… CDC: Oh, Hell! Neil Diamond: Touching You! CDC: Milpitas is doomed :/ Neil Diamond sings “Sweet Caroline” with updated lyric for safety during Covid-19 pandemic. Stay safe out there! Coronavirus COVID-19 Updates for Milpitas As the Coronavirus COVID-19 has hit our city and county particularly hard, I will use this post to keep you updated on important information you will need right here in town. Some posts here will be updated with extra links…
