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The Last Page of the Internet
Computing Jokes Thank you for visiting the End of the Internet. Congratulations! This is the last page. Thank you for visiting the End of the Internet. There are no more links. You must now turn off your computer and go do something productive. Shut down and go outside. Go read a book, for pete’s sake. A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke.
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Taking a Load of Penguins to the Zoo
Animal Jokes Kimo is a bus driver for the Santa Clara Valley Transportation Authority. One day Kimo is headed to work on his bus route, when he runs across a delivery van stranded at the side of the road. The van driver works for the Happy Hollow Park and Zoo. He pleads with Kimo to do him a favor. He offers a $100 bill to Kimo to help him deliver a truckload of penguins to the zoo, because they needed to be there within the hour. Agreeing, Kimo proceeds to load two dozen penguins onto his bus. Then, off they drive towards the zoo. An hour later, the delivery driver…
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You Know You Live in Milpitas When…
Computing Jokes & Milpitas Jokes You make over $250,000 and still can’t afford a house. You see nothing but expensive cars because of <above>. You have more bandwidth in your apartment or condo than most major universities. Your commute time is 45 minutes and you live 8 miles from work. You see a billboard that says “FGPA2ASIC” and aren’t fazed. You stop asking how much things cost and start asking “How long will it take?” The fastest part of your commute is down your driveway. You don’t understand how the FasTrak work because you normally don’t commute during those hours. You take a bus and are shocked at 2 people…
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Milpitas Xtreme Robotics Making 3D Face Shields
Milpitas Xtreme Robotics is the official robotics club of Milpitas High School, and we aim to offer opportunities for club members to pursue a career in STEM, robotics, and engineering through hands-on experiences with robots. More than just that, however, we’re life-changers and big thinkers. We’re not afraid to get our hands dirty with a robot. We’re a club that works on crazy projects all the time. Our mission is to spark a passion for robotics in our members; to watch them fall in love and to help them never let go. This past year, our club of 100+ members has worked on 5 major competitions, 5 major projects, 7…
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A Recap of the First Three Weeks with Covid-19
Covid Jokes Here’s a recap of the last three weeks, courtesy of Peter Lengsfelder: A RECAP OF THE LAST THREE WEEKS AMERICA: Oh my god! Coronavirus! What should we do? CALIFORNIA: Shut down your state. AMERICA: Wait… what? Why? CALIFORNIA: Because 40 million people live here and we did it early, and it’s working. OHIO: Whoa… whoa… let’s not be hasty now. The president said that this whole coronavirus thing is a democratic hoax. CALIFORNIA: He also said that windmills cause cancer. Shut down your state. TEXAS: But the president said that there are only 15 cases and soon there will be zero. CALIFORNIA: The president can’t count to fifteen.…
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Covid-19 is making me crack up!
Covid Jokes Covid-19 is making me crack up! Half of us are going to come out of this quarantine as amazing cooks. The other half will come out with a drinking problem. I used to spin that toilet paper like I was on Wheel of Fortune. Now I turn it like I’m cracking a safe. I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator. Still haven’t decided where to go for Passover/Easter—– The Living Room or The Bedroom Public Service Announcement: Every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom. Homeschooling is going well. 2 students…
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Easter Egg Hunt on GoMilpitas
A virtual Easter Egg Hunt just for Milpitas kids 5-95 has ended for Easter 2020 on GoMilpitas.com! Watch for the 2021 egg hunt next spring. I will start with a clue on this post, which will hint at the topic on another GoMilpitas.com post. Each egg you find will have the clue to where the next egg is hidden. If the clue doesn’t help, I will be tagging each page with “Easter Egg Hunt” so you will see the list of all the pages. But for the fun of it, try doing it with just the hints. I will also post the clues in the Facebook GoMilpitas Group, and those…
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Neil Diamond vs CDC on Hands, Touching Hands
Covid Jokes Neil Diamond: Hands, CDC: Yes, wash them for at least 20 seconds. Neil Diamond: touching hands, CDC: No! Please don’t touch hands! Neil Diamond: reaching out… CDC: Avoid that, too! Neil Diamond: touching me… CDC: Oh, Hell! Neil Diamond: Touching You! CDC: Milpitas is doomed :/ Neil Diamond sings “Sweet Caroline” with updated lyric for safety during Covid-19 pandemic. Stay safe out there! Coronavirus COVID-19 Updates for Milpitas As the Coronavirus COVID-19 has hit our city and county particularly hard, I will use this post to keep you updated on important information you will need right here in town. Some posts here will be updated with extra links…
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San Francisco Bay Area and Silicon Valley Adventure Clubs
Do you believe that outdoor adventure is of huge benefit to our community and society in general? It is our aim to promote community well-being and social cohesion while encouraging healthy lifestyles and environmental awareness. Absolute Adventures GPS Scavenger Hunts, Sailing Regattas, Wine Tasting, Culinary Team Building, Mind-Bending Treasure Hunts and so much more! Bay Area Outdoor Adventure Club The bay area’s only activity club where you can do something different every weekend! Try new sports and get to know other bay area adventurers in a fun Club environment. Outback Adventures A comprehensive outdoor guide service, rental shop, kayak and nordic ski specialty retailer located in Saratoga and Larkspur. Outdoor…
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Official Market Forecast
Money Jokes Sales and income figures show an easing up of the rate at which business is easing off. This can be taken as ample proof of the government’s contention that there’s a slowing-up of the slow-down. Now to clarify that, it should be noted that the slowing-up of the slow-down is not as good as an upturn in the down-turn. Also, it suggests that the climate’s about right for an adjustment of the readjustment to rate structures. Now, turning specifically to rates. We find a very definite decrease in the rate of increase. This clearly shows there should be a letting up of the letdown. Of course, if the…
