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All the Urban Legends Rolled Into One
Amazing Facts & Computing Jokes No need to read all those other urban legends, etc. ever again. Here they are, all in one: I know this guy in Milpitas whose neighbor, a young man, was home recovering from having been served a rat in his bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken. So anyway, one day he went to sleep and when he awoke he was in his bathtub, it was full of ice, and he was sore all over. When he got out of the tub he realized that HIS KIDNEYS HAD BEEN STOLEN and he saw a note on his mirror that said, “Call 911!” But he was afraid to…
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Ways To Really Annoy Telemarketers
Amazing Facts Telephone Service in Milpitas Includes a section with really good advice for totally avoiding telemarketing calls all together. 1. If a telemarketer wants to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money. 2. If they start out with, “How are you today?” say, “Why do you want to know?” Alternately, you can tell them, “I’m so glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems; my sciatica is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog just died…” When they try to get to the sell, just keep talking about your…
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Everyday Maxims
Amazing Facts Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines. Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol. I intend to live forever – so far, so good. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? If you ain’t makin’ waves, you ain’t kickin’ hard enough! Mental backup in progress – Do Not Disturb! Mind Like A Steel Trap – Rusty And Illegal In 37 States. Quantum Mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of. Support bacteria – they’re the only culture some people have. The only substitute for good…
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Kids Talk About God & Their Mother
Amazing Facts The following are different answers given by school-age children to the given questions: Why did God make mothers? 1. She’s the only one who knows where the scotch tape is. 2. Think about it, it was the best way to get more people. 3. Mostly to clean the house. 4. To help us out of there when we were getting born. How did God make mothers? 1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us. 2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 3. God made my mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. Why did God give…
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US Standard Railroad Gauge
Amazing Facts or How MilSpecs Live Forever The US standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 ft 8 1/2 in (1.44 m). That’s an exceedingly odd number. Why is that gauge used? Because that’s the way they built them in England, and the US railroads were built by English ex-patriots. Why did the English build ’em like that? Because the first rail lines were built by the same people who built the pre-railroad tramways, and that’s the gauge they used. Why did they use that gauge then? Because the people who built the tramways used the same jigs and tools as they used for building wagons, which used…
