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Help Support GoMilpitas!

  • Jokes

    Covid Jokes – Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Jokes

    January 16, 2023 /

    Are we there yet? Dr. Fauci driving SUV with lots of kids yelling, “Are we there yet?” as approaching “Normal” lane marker. Breaking News Joke Women age 30-59 are most likely to carry CORONOVIRUS without symptoms! Coronavirus Quarantine Travel Puns You can’t say when this lockdown will be over, *Kenya*? COVID advice for Geeks COVID advice from Silicon Valley County Health Department, which has been sending out advice in many languages. Seems appropriate they also send it out in code! Covid-19 BINGO Usual BINGO rules, with this exception: If any game player sees someone sneeze or cough without a mask and into the open air, the game is over, and…

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    Ann Zeise

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    June 25, 2024
  • Jokes

    Covid Vaccine Memes

    January 29, 2022 /
    Me Celebrating

    Covid Jokes My mate got their covid vaccine yesterday and I can tell you the most prominent side effect is the inability to shut up about getting the covid vaccine. Scientists looking at data for the Oxford Vaccine: “Might – MIGHT – increase risk of blood clots. Pause all use immediately! Scientists looking at data about blood clots in women and the contraceptive pill over 60 years: Deal with it! “I’m not getting a vaccine so they can microchip me!” says the man typing into his phone that tracks his every thought and constantly logs his location. Christmas normally vs Christmas this year… The owners of Zoom reading that the…

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  • Jokes

    Highs and Lows of Wearing Face Masks

    September 17, 2021 /
    Mask Selfie

    Covid Jokes Due to the order to wear face masks, some humorous observations have been made: My gawd! Enough with the face mask selfies! I’m wearing a bra today but as a face mask. Ripping off your face mask when you get back in the car is the new taking off your bra when you get home. An added benefit of wearing a mask is that men on the street no longer tell me to smile. I was smiling at people the other day at the store until I realized I didn’t have to and it was a magical moment. According to my bathroom scale, my face mask weighs about…

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    April 18, 2021
  • Jokes

    Are we there yet?

    March 12, 2021 /

    Covid Jokes Dr. Fauci driving SUV with lots of kids yelling, “Are we there yet?” as approaching “Normal” lane marker. A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke.

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    April 14, 2020
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    February 25, 2019
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    January 5, 2023
  • Jokes

    Look, I don’t come into your home office and tell you to get out of the tub!

    February 23, 2021 /

    Covid Jokes “Look, I don’t come into your home office and tell you to get out of the tub!” A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke.

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    June 22, 2024
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    April 24, 2020
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    March 30, 2023
  • Jokes

    William Shakespeare Gets His Covid Vaccine

    February 1, 2021 /

    Covid Jokes William Shakespeare becomes the 2nd person to receive the Pfizer-BioNTech #COVID19 vaccine (outside of a trial) in Coventry, England. Nurse: Which arm? WS: As you like it Nurse: was that painful? WS: Much ado about nothing. Nurse: you will have to have a second jab. WS: Measure for measure? Nurse: so what do you think of the govt handling of Covid? WS: Comedy of Errors. Actually I heard the second person to get the vaccine was Christopher Marlowe but William Shakespeare took all the credit. Actually it was Sir Francis Bacon, and he allowed Shakespeare to take the credit. All’s Well That Ends Well. The Taming of the…

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    December 9, 2020
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    February 21, 2025
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    May 26, 2020
  • Jokes

    T’was 3 weeks before Christmas

    December 9, 2020 /

    Covid Jokes T’was 3 weeks before Christmas, And all through the town, People wore masks, That covered their frown. The frown had begun Way back in the Spring, When a global pandemic Changed everything. They called it corona, But unlike the beer, It didn’t bring good times, It didn’t bring cheer. Airplanes were grounded, Travel was banned. Borders were closed Across air, sea and land. As the world entered lockdown To flatten the curve, The economy halted, And folks lost their nerve. From March to July We rode the first wave, People stayed home, They tried to behave. When summer emerged The lockdown was lifted. But away from caution, Many…

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    December 31, 2020
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    January 21, 2023
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    August 2, 2019
  • Jokes

    Stop complaining! You need to keep it on.

    November 14, 2020 /

    Animal Jokes & Covid Jokes 2019 Stop complaining! You need to keep it on. It’s for your own good. 2020 Dog grins at master wearing face mask. A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke.

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    May 13, 2020
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    October 18, 2018
  • Jokes

    Where’s Waldo? Social Distancing Edition

    September 24, 2020 /

    Covid Jokes “When I saw the cartoon today, it made me think of how the things we took for granted as a child back then are no longer considered “SAFE.” Not just from an environmental standpoint, but from simple things like social gatherings. I never thought I would live to see the day when the whole country would be in such a state of affairs as exists now with the COVID-19 virus.” A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke.

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  • Jokes

    COVID advice for Geeks

    September 13, 2020 /

    Covid Jokes COVID advice from Silicon Valley County Health Department, which has been sending out advice in many languages. Seems appropriate they also send it out in code! A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke.

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    August 2, 2019
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