A Milpitan walked in to The Park Victoria Barber Shop for his regular haircut. As he snips away, Anthony asks “What’s up?” The Milpitan proceeds to explain he’s taking a vacation to Rome. “ROME?!” Anthony says, “Why would you want to go there? It’s a crowded dirty city full of Italians! You’d be crazy to go to Rome! So how ya getting there?” “We’re taking TWA,” the Milpitan replies. “TWA?!” yells Anthony. “They’re a terrible airline. Their planes are old, their flight attendants are ugly and they’re always late! So where you staying in Rome?” The Milpitan says “We’ll be at the downtown International Marriot.” “That DUMP?!” says Anthony. “That’s…

Milpitas Jokes Don’t squat with your spurs on. Don’t interfere with something that ain’t botherin’ you none. Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance. The easiest way to eat crow is while it’s still warm. The colder it gets, the harder it is to swaller. If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin’. If it don’t seem like it’s worth the effort, it probably ain’t. It don’t take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep. The biggest troublemaker you’ll probably ever have to deal with watches you shave his face in the mirror…

Milpitas Jokes New slogan for Silicon Valley: “Unlike the rest of the country, our people are bright and our lights are dim.” Bay Area Comedian, Clifford Fewel     PG&E now officially stands for “Power Grid Envy.” Los Angeles Comedian, Perry Kurtz     It’s a big night in Disneyland in California as they open their new theme park ‘California Adventure.’ However, due to the power outages in California, the Country Bear Jamboree will performed unplugged.” Jimmy Fallon on Saturday Night Live     Jay Leno suggests that California conserve energy by doing away with the yellow part of traffic lights “because nobody pays attention to those anyway.”    …

Milpitas Jokes Two elderly Milpitas ladies had been friends since their 30s. Now in their 80s they still get together a couple of times a week to play cards. One day they were playing gin rummy and one of them said, “You know we’ve been friends for many years and, please don’t get mad, but for the life of me I can’t remember your name. Please tell me what it is.” Her friend glared at her. She continued to glare and stare at her for at least 3 minutes. Finally she said, “How soon do you need to know?” A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke

Milpitas Jokes A frustrated Silicon Valley dad vented, “When I was a youngster, I was disciplined by being sent to my room without supper. But in my son’s room, he has his own color TV, iPhone, computer, and DVD player.” “So what do you do?” asked his friend. “I send him to MY room!” exclaimed the father. A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke