Best Dinosaur Jokes Comedy Routine Ever!
This set of dinosaur jokes comedy routine could be read by two kids or a kid and an adult as a skit for a children’s group.
Can a bad dinosaur comedian get a laugh?
You bet Jurassican.
How do you cheer up a blue Dilophosaurus?
Tell him some dinosaur jokes!
Why do museums have so many old dinosaur bones?
Because they can’t find any new ones!
Why do comedians tell so many old dinosaur jokes?
Because they also can’t find any new ones!
Why can’t they find new fossils or new jokes?
They’re lazy bones!
Why don’t they find a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
Such as a Thesaurus.
That dinosaur is mad we didn’t pick it.
He’s a saur loser.
How would you know if a dinosaur was in bed with you?
I’d be awakened by the dino-snores.
Quick! Hide under the bed!
I-don’t-think-he-saur-us!
Did you notice he ate your pillow?
Yes, he’s down in the mouth.
Where could that dinosaur go to buy you a new, cheap pillow?
He could go to the dino-store.
And what if he instead got into your refrigerator?
Well, I certainly couldn’t close the door!
Did you notice the dinosaur ate the meat raw?
He didn’t know how to barbeque!
But the dinosaur sure did like the hot dogs!
Because they reminded him of Jurassic Pork!
Do you know how long dinosaurs should be fed?
Exactly as long as you feed short dinosaurs!
Do those two dinosaurs seem to look alike?
Yes, they are a Pair-odactyls!
What kind of dinosaur never gives up?
A Try-try-triceratops.
Those dinosaurs seems to be very anxious!
Of course! They are Nervous-rex.
What did the Triceratops sit on at the park?
The dino-see-saur!
What did the Triceratops sit with?
His Tricera-bottom!
What did it sound like when it broke?
Like dino-mite!
Who did you call for help?
The Tricera-cops!
How many dinosaurs can stay dry under a palm tree?
If it isn’t raining, quite a few!
But what if a dinosaur does stay out in the rain?
He becomes a stegosaur-rust.
What kind of dinosaur might you see at a rodeo?
A Tyrannosaurus Tex.
And what would he be doing at the rodeo?
Trying to ride a Bronco-saurus.
And when he gets bucked off?
He’d be Tyrannosaurus wrecks!
What would you then give him so he’d feel better?
Tea, Rex?
What’s the difference between a strawberry and a Tyrannosaurus?
A strawberry is red.
Why did the Tyrannosaurus paint her toenails red?
So she could hide in the strawberry patch!
What happened when she hid in the strawberry patch?
We wound up with a whole lot of strawberry jam!
Did that strawberry-covered dinosaur take a bath?
Why? Is there one missing?
Why did dinosaurs go extinct?
They didn’t take baths.
I hear she ran across the road.
Silly! There weren’t any roads back then! The chicken ran across many years later.
Was she wearing any clothes?
Nope. There weren’t any dino-sewers back then.
But I heard there was one female dinosaur who had a blouse business!
It was called “Try Sara’s Tops.”
Do you think anything could tricera-top these dinosaur puns?
I dino what to tell you, but probably not.
What do you call someone who tells too many dinosaur jokes?
A dino-bore.
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@JurassicPark2go
We’re sorry to report that the T-Rex somehow broke loose and is coming out with a Netflix stand up comedy special in Spring 2021! We never meant for this to happen…we’re issuing refunds for all Season Pass V.I.P Members!
by Ann Zeise