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Milpitas Mom’s’s 25 Worse Puns
25 of the Worse Puns I can think of right now…but wait! There are more! 1. Dad, are we pyromaniacs? Yes, we arson 2. What do you call a pig with laryngitis? Disgruntled. 3. Writing my name in cursive is my signature move. 4. Why do bees stay in their hives during winter? Swarm. 5. If you’re bad at haggling, you’ll end up paying the price. 6. Just so everyone’s clear, I’m going to put my glasses on. 7. A commander walks into a bar and orders everyone around. 8. I lost my job as a stage designer. I left without making a scene. 9. Never buy flowers from a monk.…
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Densa IQ Test
Amazing Facts You’ve heard of MENSA the group for geniuses with IQ’s of 140 and above? Well this test is similar, it’s from DENSA and it’s a lot more fun. Here’s the quiz with the answers. Do they have a 4th of July in England? Yes/No Answer ___ Yes___ How many birthdays does the average man have? Answer _1, Just one!_ Some months have 31 days; how many have 28? Answer _12, all of them!_ How many outs are there in an inning? Answer_6, three per side!_ Is it legal for a man in California to marry his widow’s sister? Yes/No Answer _No – because he is dead!_ Divide 30…
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Are we there yet?
Covid Jokes Dr. Fauci driving SUV with lots of kids yelling, “Are we there yet?” as approaching “Normal” lane marker. A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke.
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Look, I don’t come into your home office and tell you to get out of the tub!
Covid Jokes “Look, I don’t come into your home office and tell you to get out of the tub!” A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke.
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Best Dinosaur Jokes Comedy Routine Ever!
This set of dinosaur jokes comedy routine could be read by two kids or a kid and an adult as a skit for a children’s group. Can a bad dinosaur comedian get a laugh? You bet Jurassican. How do you cheer up a blue Dilophosaurus? Tell him some dinosaur jokes! Why do museums have so many old dinosaur bones? Because they can’t find any new ones! Why do comedians tell so many old dinosaur jokes? Because they also can’t find any new ones! Why can’t they find new fossils or new jokes? They’re lazy bones! Why don’t they find a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? Such as a Thesaurus. That…
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William Shakespeare Gets His Covid Vaccine
Covid Jokes William Shakespeare becomes the 2nd person to receive the Pfizer-BioNTech #COVID19 vaccine (outside of a trial) in Coventry, England. Nurse: Which arm? WS: As you like it Nurse: was that painful? WS: Much ado about nothing. Nurse: you will have to have a second jab. WS: Measure for measure? Nurse: so what do you think of the govt handling of Covid? WS: Comedy of Errors. Actually I heard the second person to get the vaccine was Christopher Marlowe but William Shakespeare took all the credit. Actually it was Sir Francis Bacon, and he allowed Shakespeare to take the credit. All’s Well That Ends Well. The Taming of the…
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Where Do Pets Come From?
Animal Jokes A newly discovered chapter in the Book of Genesis has provided the answer: “Where do pets come from?” Adam and Eve said, “Lord, when we were in the garden, you walked with us every day. Now we do not see you anymore. We are lonesome here and it is difficult for us to remember how much you love us.” And God said, “No problem! I will create a companion for you that will be with you and who will be a reflection of my love for you, so that you will love me even when you cannot see me. Regardless of how selfish or childish or unlovable you…
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Maxims to Share
A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke.
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Bernie @ Milpitas City Hall
Put Bernie at your place! A Milpitas Mom’s Favorite Joke.
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Pie Throwing Trend in Milpitas
Computing Jokes & Milpitas Jokes I think we have the makings of a new trend here since Bill Gates was “pied.” Anytime a computer exec says something stupid – POW – they get a pie in the face. I can just see it now: “… java virtual machine …” – WHAM – call the dry cleaners. “… the new upgrade is, of course, a whole new paradigm and thus incompatable with the original software …” – SMACK – they won’t do that again. “… you can surf the news faster, without changing either your connection or your modem …” – POW – 2 cream pies, one in each ear. “……
